Sa mga takot sa kagat ng hindi nangangagat na barya

Sumakay ako sa Toki nung isang araw. Pag baba ko nalungkot ako or rather nainis ako. Nakakainis talaga pag may nakasakay kang mga taong takot sa kagat ng hindi nangangagat na barya.
Iba-iba pa ang istilo ng mga yan. May mga lingon to the max kunwari'y hindi napapansin ang inaabot na barya. Kahit mapaos ka pa sa kakasabi ng "Makikiabot po ng bayad" ay wala kang mapapala. Mayroon namang sleeping beauty ang drama. Tulog kunwari. Di bale ng mauntog 'wag lang makagat ng hindi nangangagat na barya. Kawawang barya. At ang pinakamatindi sa lahat ng matindi ay ang mga taong tinitingnan lang ang inaabot mong barya na para bang sinasabi "Fly barya. Fly!"
Paano kung lahat ng tao ay matakot sa kagat ng hindi nangangagat na barya? Paano kung bawat sakay mo ng jeep ay kailangan mo pang lumapit sa driver (habang nakatuwad) para iabot ang bayad mo? Hindi kaya magka-scoliosis lahat ng tao?
Hindi ba mas magiging maganda ang araw nating lahat kung aabutin natin ang bayad ng iba at makakarinig pa ng "salamat" na may bonus pang smile? Hindi ba mas magiging maganda ang araw nating lahat kung sa pag-abot natin ng ating bayad ay may nakahandang umabot nito?Hindi ba mas magiging maganda ang araw nating lahat kung lahat tayo ay hindi takot sa kagat ng hindi nangangagat na barya??

Eh

e kung kaibigan lang tingin niya sa akin e
e hindi nga niya ako tinitingnan e
e kung iba talaga ang gusto niya e
e kung iba is not an element of ako e
e kung hindi siya interesado sa akin e
e kung hindi niya nakikita ang tunay na ako e
e kung makita man niya, ayaw rin niya e
e kung talagang hindi niya malimutan yung isa e
e kung hindi niya alam na gusto ko siya e
e kahit malamn niya wala naman siyang pakialam e
e kung umasa man ako wala ring mangyayari e
e naninigas na ang dila ko sa ka-e-e e
kaya sabi nga sa "Libre"
"e kung hindi ikaw ang laman ng puso niya e"
ANONG MAGAGAWA MO?

goodbye Little Miss Vain

hindi talaga ako bibo
hindi rin ata ako tao

I really want to please everybody. I find enjoyment and thrill in that. But as I grow older, I began to see that you REALLY can't please everybody without displeasing yourself.

It came up to me like a child realizing that the world isn't just about sugar, spice and everthing nice. Of course, I felt hurt. All my life I believ ed I can please everybody. Yes, you can call me Little Miss Vain.

But it looks like Little Miss Vain has to give up her vanity because she just can't please evreybody. I just can't please everybody.

hindi ako katulad mo
hindi ko kaya ang mga ginagawa mo
masakit sa akin na hindi ka masiyahan
pero higt akong masasaktan
kung mawawalan ako ng sariling katauhan
kaya...
GOODBYE LITTLE MISS VAIN

Thank you, GOD

I was standing there one afternoon. My chest was heavy with unreleased sighs. My eyes were sore with held-back tears.
I bid goodbye to Little Miss Vain that afternoon and I could do nothing but hide my pain. I was so afraid. I have lived my life with her in me. Now, I'm afraid to take another step without her. I still felt her remnants in me and that made it much harder. I felt so lost.
Thank you God for sending an angel who reminded me that you are always there for me.
I realized how dumb I was. You were right in front of me yet I searched for others to wipe away my fears.
As I come into your presence, tears trickled down my cheeks. I was like a wounded child running to her father, telling him who caused those wounds.
Then you told me

" When fears weaken your knees, when you can't take it anymore, turn to me. I will not wipe away your fears but I will help you keep your knees from falling apart"

Those were the exact words I needed to hear. I felt a lot better.

I have not gotten over Little Miss Vain. I can still feel her inside me. Please make me strong enought to get over her. Thank you Lord. Thank you God. Thank you, Father.